Dear extended family,
We love addressing you this way because there is such a need in modern society for extended family. We may have our birth family, even a great one, yet it is equally important to establish a family by heart connections – a spiritual extended family. And you are definitely that to us.
Peace be to us all.
From our hearts to your hearts,
Joyce & Barry Vissell |
John-Nuriel's graduation from Mount Madonna High School, June 2007.
From left: Rami, Barry, John-Nuriel, Joyce, Mira, and Louise sitting in front.
Dear Friends,
We are sending you our love and support for this shared journey of life. We feel very grateful for our connection with you.
For the past year and a half, our family of five has been extensively caring for my aging mother, as she has required more and more care. She has been living right next door to us on our property for the past fifteen years. The last three weeks of her life she was in a hospital bed in her little apartment and we cared for her daily. My mother’s final gift to us was a glimpse into the spirit world -- into heaven.
The last two weeks of my mother’s life, she was more in the spirit world than she was in this world. Sitting with her from early morning until very late at night, she was able to share her visions of angels and great teachings of light. As exhausting as this experience was at times, Barry and I both feel transformed by all she was able to communicate to us about the true home she was going to. I feel so inspired by all that was given to me in that final two weeks, that perhaps a new book will emerge.
At one point I was sitting with my mother while she had her eyes closed. She was not sleeping, as every once in a while she would respond to someone on the other side of the veil who was talking to her. We would hear her say, “Oh, you mean I don’t have to hold my breath, I just let it out. Thank you. Thank you. THANK YOU”.
Another time she looked above my head and her eyes were blazing with light. She smiled and said, “Your angel is so beautiful, close to you always, and especially close when you help other people. My angel is so close to me right now, helping me to come home.”
Once I entered her apartment after a short break to find my mother talking with her eyes closed to someone I could not see. I quietly sat on the couch next to her, notebook in hand, recording as much as I could. Soon I realized that she was talking to my dad, who had passed on eight years ago. She was mostly listening and would say things like, “Oh really Hank,” and, “Oh how wonderful, I can’t wait to join you.” There were long silences and he must have been telling her quite a bit. To pass the time, while her eyes were closed, I found a photo book of pictures my dad had taken probably twelve years ago. My dad recorded everything on photo. He would take a photo of every angle of a room, bathroom, shelf etc. He also took pictures of every event. We often teased him about the abundance of photos he took. Now I smiled to myself, as I enjoyed them. After a while I put the photo album away and just sat quietly with my mother. Her eyes were still closed and she seemed to still be listening to my dad. Suddenly she opened her eyes and said to me, “Your dad is very happy that you were looking at his photos.” And I knew without a doubt that my dad was right there with me, as much as my mom. We may not see our departed loved ones, but they are always close to us. Then my mom smiled at me and said, “Your dad has been close to you all these years since he died. I will always be close to you as well. We will both be helping you now.” She closed her eyes and a tremendous peace crossed over her face.
My mother died a few days after, in total peace and acceptance. Of course we are all saddened at the loss of her physical form, but all five of us are also very excited about her final gift to us, the beauty of death and the dying process. More and more, toward the final days of her life, the feeling in the room was so similar to birth.
As each of us witnessed her death, we also felt inspired to live our lives knowing that each day is a gift and a chance to give love and support to others. It was not easy caring for my mother for such a long time, and yet all five of us received a gift of transformation and inspiration. We as a family are truly grateful.
At some point in our lives, each of us may have the opportunity to care for a loved one at the end of their physical life. Please realize the tremendous opportunity for spiritual growth in this caring process. Joyce and I were inspired years ago when Ram Dass took a whole year off from his writing and teaching schedule to care for his dying father. In that year, his relationship with his father was completely transformed.
We may think we are caring for a loved one, helping to usher them into the world of spirit, but it is just as much that we are the ones being cared for, we are the ones being opened to the land of light in this miraculous process called dying.
The Gift
by Rami Vissell
September 8, 2007
How do I capture the gift of death in words?
How do I convey the mystery unraveled, the blessings illuminated?
Sleepless nights, I lay witness to heavenly dialogues… well one side of them anyways.
Countless gentle unseen beings fluttering in, fading out.
The vale between worlds was thin, at times blurred, at times nonexistent.
I reached out to touch you, wishing to take the pain away from you
Your body ebbing, yet glorious.
And you, you reached out to touch me, beyond where sensation can go.
You showed me in timeless moments a place so heavenly, so gracious, so vast…
That death’s shadow was no more than a bell harking the beginning of an incredible journey.
And why not rejoice in this beginning. I feel so lucky to come along with you for your first few steps.
Tears? Yes.
Joy? Yes!
Death, birth, you taught me that life certainly goes on.
What a gift you gave me, to deeply know of the peace that awaits me, and all of us, beyond these bodies.
No fear is necessary, just a gentle exhale, and away you go, free!
I am so honored.
Thank you Grandma.
I love you!
From our hearts to your hearts, Joyce & Barry Vissell
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